Undead and Unwelcome Read online

Chapter 28-29

 

  Chapter 28

  My king,

  Things here are as well as can be expected. I have reviewed the quarterly report from your holdings in Los Angeles and it seems the new security system for the company's web server is doing the job.

  Laura seems to be entertaining quite a bit in your absence; it seems there are always strangers in the house. Neither Marc nor Laura has said anything to me about them, so I am respecting their privacy and assuming they are trying to fill the void left by the absence of you and the queen.

  I trust this finds you and Her Majesty well. If you require anything of me, do not hesitate to contact me at once. In the meantime, I have FedExed copies of the contracts for your most recently acquired properties. Please review them at your leisure, sign them if they are satisfactory, and return them to me. I will then take the next step.

  My love and fealty to you both.

  -Tina

  "See?" I whined. "Why can't I get e-mails like that? Not only is it clear and understandable, it's in English!"

  "My love, what in the world are you talking about?"

  "Look!" I stabbed a finger at the printout of Marc's latest rambling.

  hey, grrrrl, miss you bad. things out here are BTW, but I've got a handle on it. Laura says howdy and wants you to GBH ASAP. tell your magically delicious hubby to answer tina's e-mails; the grrl is FRO! later, marc.

  "I have no idea what he's talking about," I muttered. "This might as well be in French. "

  "What is a FRO?" Sinclair asked, studying the printout.

  "My point! How should I know? When I send an e-mail, I actually spell words out. And use punctuation. "

  "Light of my life, while I enjoy tirelessly listening to your never-ending litany of complaints, I believe we have slightly more pressing matters to discuss. For example, your attempted murder. And our appearance before the Council. "

  "Yeah, yeah. But we're getting back to this e-mail thing. "

  We'd been back in our suite for about twenty minutes. The first thing Sinclair did was strip me out of my ruined suit and blouse and examine me from head to toe. It was a waste of time-I was fine. But sometimes there was no talking to the stubborn cuss I had married.

  "So, dish. " I had put BabyJon down for a midnight nap and was lying on our bed, covertly feeling my chest now and again. Nope, no gaping holes. "What happened after I got stabbed?"

  "Oh, the usual. Pandemonium. Violence. Threats. More violence. "

  "You suck at narratives. "

  He bowed his head modestly. I knew I was wasting my breath (so to speak). Sinclair wasn't about to confess that he'd been scared out of his mind yet again. He liked to play it cool, even with me.

  "Logically, your attempted murder can only help us. "

  "Gee, thanks. So glad to be of service. " I sat up and swung my right leg out to kick him in the shin, which he neatly avoided.

  "Elizabeth, you know exactly what I mean. "

  "Michael's humiliated and mortified, which the Council will pick up on? Like that?"

  "Yes. Like that. "

  "They must have been pretty surprised when I got up off the floor. "

  He grinned. "Yes, indeed. Once I was able to remove the chair leg from your sternum, you woke up almost instantly-and healed as quickly. "

  "Glad to be of help. That Sara girl was nice. She was about the only one who was nice. "

  He shrugged and eased out of his jacket. "Give them time. Your warped charm will eventually win them over. "

  "Hypocrites. Is it just me, or did Antonia never get a call or a visit from these guys the whole time she was living with us?"

  "It is not just you. But take comfort in the fact that in the last year of her life Antonia found love and happiness with us. Something she apparently could not get out here. "

  That was sad. These yo-yos were supposed to be her family. But nobody had much cared until she was killed. Hell, they hadn't even known she was in a committed relationship with another vampire-Garrett, who had killed himself about four seconds after he'd realized the love of his life was dead.

  It was all too awful to contemplate and for a moment I envied Jessica, lying in a dark bedroom and sleeping through this entire rotten mess.

  But that was no way to be; it certainly didn't solve anything. We had to move forward-even if it meant leaving some people behind.

  Chapter 29

  Dude,

  It's really hard to write this. I'm embarrassed and mad at myself. But I'd better get it off my chest, so listen up.

  I can pinpoint the exact moment I realized the shit was hitting the fan. It was the next morning, long after Tina had retired for the day. I was minding my own business, wolfing down a bowl of Special K and reading the latest John Sandford novel, when Laura bopped in.

  She seemed more cheerful than usual, which was nice, because she'd been awfully stressed since Betsy and Sinclair left. And she looked even prettier than usual-and Laura was a beautiful girl-with her buttercup yellow sweater and faded jeans, her blond hair pulled back in its perpetual pony-tail, big eyes bright and sparkling.

  "Morning!" she chirped, sitting across from me. "Did I get any calls?"

  "Uh, no. Are you expecting one?"

  "Sure. I had this great idea and I have you to thank for it. I'll hopefully find out today if it worked. "

  Dude, I should have followed up right then. But I didn't. I figured she was involved with some church thing, or was working on a project for school. I'm an ER resident, not a shrink. How was I supposed to know she'd lost her mind?

  Yeah, I know. It's all just a bunch of crap justification now. I should have been paying closer attention, and I wasn't. That's the long and short of it.

  "It's going to solve a lot of problems," Laura continued, and I admit I was barely listening to her. "I've just been so worried about Betsy ever since she almost died (again) when Antonia got shot. "

  "Betsy's always almost dying again. " I was a little more sanguine about the vampire queen's resilience; I had seen many, many strange things since Betsy stopped me from killing myself a couple years back. "She's like our own personal Kenny. "

  "Kenny?"

  "FromSouthPark. Pop culture reference; sorry. " Laura tended to stick to network news and the Food Network. A single episode ofSouthParkwould horrify and disgust her. Sometimes the show horrified me, too, but I was still addicted to it. Nobody's perfect.

  "Where's Tina?"

  "Conked out in her room-you know how it is with her. She won't be going anywhere until the sun's down. "

  "I have something for her," Laura said vaguely. "And some people want to see her. "

  "Great. " I yawned. New vampires were always stopping by the mansion to pay their respects. "Thank God it's my day off. I need a break from sick people. "

  Laura giggled. "That's an odd thing for a doctor to say. "

  "Honey, all doctors say it. Just not around patients. "

  "I'm sure that's-"

  The phone rang and Laura leaped to her feet, practically sprinting to get it before it rang again. I rolled my eyes; probably some church wanted her to run a fund-raiser or some such thing. Or maybe PBS was running another pledge drive.

  "Yes? Hello?" She paused, listening. "Okay, great! That's just great . . . uh-huh . . . really? Oh, you didn't!" She laughed, then paused again. "Uh-huh . . . you are? Terrific. Then I'll see you in a bit. Thanks very much. " She hung up.

  "Good news?" I yawned.

  "The best news. Okay, well, I've got to go. See you. "

  "Bye," I said vaguely, and I was back into my book before she got to the front door.

  So, so careless. Not to mention stupid. It's all fine and good to say now "How was I supposed to know?" except I had seen the effect the devil worshippers had on Laura. I should have been suspicious of her 180, instead of focusing on my own problems.

  But I wasn't.

 
And, though I didn't know it, it was already too late.